34,280 out of 50,000 ain't bad

Well, I've done my best. Last year I got the word count but not the quality. This year, I sincerely hope it's the reverse!
As an exercise, it's very useful because you have to be so organised and disciplined in order to do the work without allowing everything else to slide. I joined the NaNoWriMo Spain page on Facebook, and that has been fun too - mutual support without wasting time we haven't got on actually getting together in a bar somewhere!
I can't write without editing, but there's been more writing and less editing this year, or less micro-editing, anyway. Characters have come into focus and developed voices of their own: in some cases, my first impressions of them have turned out to be false - which has been interesting because it's then been a matter of rethinking a back story to get to the character and behaviour I originally had in mind, or working with the new version, which naturally affects where the story is going. Being too rigid leads to two dimensional characters that you couldn't possibly care about. Being too flexible leads to plot anarchy, and a ship that runs aground because everyone's arguing over which direction they're supposed to be sailing in. Or becomes a ghost ship, its crew and passengers doomed to a melancholy twilight existence because the captain's secretly given up and snuck overboard for a cup of tea and an extended sojourn on Facebook...
Anyhoo, not swamped in research this year, although I could probably get a respectable A Level in Physics by the time I've finished, and my long-ago Geography teacher Sister Columba would be bemused at my new-found enthusiasm for the geology of the British Isles.
Not mired in main character's mawkish navel-gazing like last year - when neither I nor she knew who she was or what she was supposed to be doing.
I don't think I've idealised - or idolised - my central characters, and I hope the occasional unsympathetic character gets a proper hearing, rather than being rolled onto the stage in pantomime stocks, under big placards saying 'Boo!' and 'Hiss!'
Still got a coherent plot, on the whole... and I think the structure works. Hope so.
And I think I'll have the first draft finished by the end of the Christmas holiday fortnight. That looks realistic from here, given that there are other also other things to be done in the next five weeks!

NaNoWriMo 2

Last year I did something astonishing, and not a little barmy: 50,000 words in 30 days. This was my first experience of  NaNoWriMo - or National Novel Writing Month - in which some 300,000 otherwise sane people from around the world commit to a 30 day timeframe in which we are supposed to write - not read, rewrite or - in  fact - edit in any way - a bit like this sentence  in fact - until we hit that magic number, after which we can switch off the laptop, reach for the rehydration salts and gold foil wrap, and return pie-eyed and gibbering softly to normal life.  I did it to see if I could do it, and lo - I could and did. Mind you, what was supposed to be a 50,000 word novel turned out to be a 50,000-word half-novel that didn't stand up to scrutiny after the event. But it met the criteria for white water writing: I finished the course and survived - and whoa! What a rush!

So, talking to my brother yesterday I discovered that he's also up for it this year. My husband - whose birthday it is today - has got more sense. That's the wisdom and maturity thing in action, but I'll be 75% of the way through NaNoWriMo by the time I catch up, so ha!

Still, I don't guarantee that I'll manage 50,000 words this year, because there is the small matter of the responsible-and-satisfying day job, also preparations for that festival which it is still FAR too early to mention in polite company, also basic requirements like sleep and the odd spot of ironing, and also wanting to be still married come midnight November 30th...

But I took a similar approach last year, and made it, so we'll just see, shall we?

Last year's Lemonade was rather fab in places but got terribly maudlin as I got more tired. Plus, what should have been - I suppose - a coming-of-age novel for a teen/young adult readership, lost focus as I got too interested in the other characters and generations who figured in the life of the central character. I like novels about families, communities and connections, and I would really like to be able to write one. Something as complete, satisfying and deceptively simple as an egg, rather than the literary equivalent of the kitchen drawer that won't stay shut. 

Anyway. Last year's identical twins and ESP (Oh no, not another twin bond story.....) gives way to this year's non-identical twins and genetic predisposition. Indeed. Evolving, you see. The North-West of England instead of the South-West and south coast. Physics rather than baking. And this one's definitely about and for young teens. I can more or less see and hear Tattie and Philip and their immediate family. I've got the back story and the central puzzle, plus a notion of how it's resolved. I've got ten days to plot the missing elements without actually writing a single word. Then I'll have 30 days to put it all together in a reasonably coherent first draft - which would definitely be an improvement on last year.

In the meantime, it's still October. What a shame you can't stockpile sleep as if it were canned food or toilet rolls.

NaNoWriMo - Done!

See what I can do once I scrap the deadline pressure - meet the deadline! Yay! I went to bed at 5, went off to work at 49,132, with 868 words left to write. Tonight: 50,475. I rest my laptop.

I am so chuffed with myself!

NaNoWriMo

My husband is about to embark on a piece of lunacy, and I think I'm going to join him.

It's NaNoWriMo - National Novel Writing Month - brought to us by the Office of Letters and Light ( at http://www.nanowrimo.org/ )

I have a full-time job which I am unsuccessfully trying to keep within bounds so that I can have a part-time life with my very nice husband. And I've got a full-time novel which I am determined will be The One I Finish. Why would I want to commit myself to writing 50,000 words in 30 days, when I'm already putting in 50+ hours a week on my 35 hour day job, and living part of every day and night in a twilight zone of imaginary people and events spanning eight decades and three countries?

Yet that, I think, is the appeal. Consider:

What is NaNoWriMo?

National Novel Writing Month is a fun, seat-of-your-pants approach to novel writing. Participants begin writing on November 1. The goal is to write a 50,000 word, (approximately 175 page) novel by 11:59:59, November 30.
Valuing enthusiasm and perseverance over painstaking craft, NaNoWriMo is a novel-writing program for everyone who has thought fleetingly about writing a novel but has been scared away by the time and effort involved.
Because of the limited writing window, the ONLY thing that matters in NaNoWriMo is output. It’s all about quantity, not quality. This approach forces you to lower your expectations, take risks, and write on the fly.
Make no mistake: You will be writing a lot of crap. And that’s a good thing. By forcing yourself to write so intensely, you are giving yourself permission to make mistakes. To forgo the endless tweaking and editing and just create. To build without tearing down.

Note those last two sentences. Crikey. I can't even send a three line email without tweaking and editing. My Draft folder sees as much action as my Spam folder. When I blog, I revise rants. My default setting is 'if-that's-all-right-by-you.' And I'm an English teacher, for God's sake! NaNoWriMo. It may be just what I need.

And I love the idea of the two of us bashing away at our repective follies. And occasionally popping out to compare notes with other volunteers for this November madness. Yes, there are others here in Madrid - and all over the world:

As you spend November writing, you can draw comfort from the fact that, all around the world, other National Novel Writing Month participants are going through the same joys and sorrows of producing the Great Frantic Novel. Wrimos meet throughout the month to offer encouragement, commiseration, and—when the thing is done—the kind of raucous celebrations that tend to frighten animals and small children.

Uhuh.

In 2010, we had over 200,000 participants. More than 30,000 of them crossed the 50K finish line by the midnight deadline, entering into the annals of NaNoWriMo superstardom forever. They started the month as auto mechanics, out-of-work actors, and middle school English teachers. They walked away novelists.

Tempted?

So, to recap:
What: Writing one 50,000-word novel from scratch in a month’s time.
Who: You! We can’t do this unless we have some other people trying it as well. Let’s write laughably awful yet lengthy prose together.
Why: The reasons are endless! To actively participate in one of our era’s most enchanting art forms! To give yourself permission to write without obsessing over quality. To be able to make obscure references to passages from our novels at parties. To stop being one of those people who say, “I’ve always wanted to write a novel,” and become one of those people who can say, “Oh, a novel? It’s such a funny story–I’ve written three.”
When: You can sign up anytime to add your name to the roster and browse the forums. Writing begins 12:00:01 November 1. To be added to the official list of winners, you must reach the 50,000-word mark by November 30 at 11:59:59. Once your novel has been verified by our web-based team of robotic word counters, the partying begins.

So I think I'm going to give it a go. I don't know if I'll make it to 50,000 words by the deadline, but since the day job really is getting in the way of The One I'm Going To Finish, maybe I should kick back and have some fun. (And I'll be in London over Christmas, so I can do some research at the V&A and the British Museum!)

Still hot

I've been sitting in this exact same place for days. It's too hot to move. It's also too hot to stay still, but I'm trying not to run the air conditioning all the time. Not all the time...

Anyway, the crochet is coming on a treat. There's a lot to be said for embarking on a big, repetitive project when you're a relative beginner. Turning a ball of yellow yarn into forty flower centres, and then turning a couple of balls of white into circles of petals around those centres, gets tedious after a while, but I'm already a lot faster than I was, and don't have to focus on every stitch as a I did at first. I made 32 nuggets during last Wednesday's Barcelona-Madrid match!

(Incidentally, does anyone else think Mourinho should be fined and put on notice for bringing the game into disrepute? He's a sour piece of work. Imagine having to work with him.)

And my technique is improving, as is my understanding of the mechanics of making stitches. After struggling to copy either of the two ergonomically correct grips, I decided to stop fretting, on the basis that if I could handle a pen, a knife, a knitting needle and a screwdriver, the grip for a crochet hook should quietly evolve, if I concentrated on making the stitches. And it did. It turns out that you (OK, I!) hold it like a salt pot. There! That didn't hurt at all.

I can see the difference between my first batches and the current one, too: more even tension, better shaped centres - and all the right way up!

Obviously, this isn't ideal, but I am not about to unpick every mistake. My policy is - damage limitation. If I spot an error in the round I'm doing, I unravel it and rework, but if I only spot it when I realise there's something awry in the next round - it stays, and I skip the extra chain space, or squidge in another, so that I don't end up with either nine or seven petals. Martha Stewart, I ain't. I've also decided that my flowerbed will have ladybirds, and perhaps the odd butterfly. Who's to know that the adorable ickle ladybirds hide a small, but perfectly formed mishmash of yarn, or that the butterfly masks a bigger mishmash? Clearly, if I have to resort to Amazonian beauties, or the finished coverlet looks like a testament to biodiversity, I shall review this policy before embarking on my next project, but I am hopeful that I will get away with my disgraceful approach to quality control.

But I'd better order Lesley Stansfield's 75 Birds, Butterflies and little beasts to knit and crochet, just to be on the safe side.

I've currently got 38 fried eggs and 5 golden nuggets, which will soon sit on 43 patches of purple, red, green and yellow, to even up with the blues and salmon. With the other 74, that puts me almost halfway to the requisite 288. Yay.

Howsoever, brain has now recovered from academic year plus summer camp. Or it had until today. I'm working on a story that originated in an EFL project I created around a fictional robbery from an art gallery. As usual, having hit knowledge barriers, I'm following white rabbits down all sorts of fascinating interconnected tunnels. Cornish history and legend. The British peerage. Japonisme. Restorers and forgers. Woman Bathing, by Mary Cassatt

a forged Goya

Van Gogh, after Hiroshige

Every so often, I pop up and do something that affects the word count.

But this patently isn't it.

The Golden Goose - extended version - 2nd EFL summer camp play

I wrote the short version of The Golden Goose for 6-10 year-olds, but it caught the fancy of the older ones, so this is the extended version, as performed by 6-13 year-olds last summer. The notes are largely the same as in the shorter version.

Two takes on a classic fairy tale, one set inside the other. The Prologue is set in the palace, where various characters are trying to make the princess laugh. Some of them are going to perform a play for her, but first there's a problem to be resolved.

• You can change and expand the Prologue entertainment to suit your children: We had a 6 year old, a 7 year old, and then seven 10-13 year-olds, so we worked from our particular children's ages, interests and abilities.
• The puppet show was a specific project with the two little ones, which was integrated into the show. The Prologue puppeteers argue about the little girl and the old man, and then play them in the main play.
• A 10-year-old had limited English and a short attention span, but he proved to be a natural juggler and percussionist with great balance, hence the poi, and the role of the Goose (comic, only says 'Honk!), and Tom (physical role, very structured setting for language - to stretch him a bit!)
• The Landlord and the Narrator could be split, but we had one boy who just soaked up lines, and had great presence, so the contrast gave him an enjoyable challenge. He had a trilby with a Narrator ticket in it, which he removed to indicate the change to Landlord. The narration actually passes from character to character.
• Mother/Princess and Father/King can be split to provide two more actors with roles, but if you've got another half-dozen children to cast, I suggest you go back to the original story, and you'll find that the landlord actually had three daughters, and Dumling and the goose meet several other characters before they happen to walk past the palace window. When your kids see the way I've played with the original, they'll see what a short, structured and entertaining improvisation/writing challenge it would be to choose, script and rehearse other characters and their encounter with the Golden Goose. Then there's the pleasure of choosing and making appropriate props to indicate character, writing the programme, doing the posters and doing the show. The Prologue is as much variety show as plot mechanism. Just because the princess doesn't laugh, it doesn't mean that the performers are no good!
• Alternatively, cut the Prologue, and the main play is short enough for a class assembly, though you'll need to tinker with the King's and the Princess's lines - or see the short version.
• If your kids write new characters, they could do their own character-appropriate acrostics. There's a section on acrostics in Writing With Children, by Jackie Reilly and Vanessa Reilly, in the Oxford Resource Books for Teachers series for primary/junior years.
• The play is in the narrative present, which gives second language learners lots of relatively painless practice at third person singular, contractions and weak forms. If you have lower secondary native speakers, they could try restoring the full forms to see whether they get an old-fashioned, fairytale feel or whether the combination with the contemporary tone (and their characters) produces something ironic and subversive. All good fun.
• We did this in a rectangular room, with the audience in one half and the acting space in the other. The actors sat on chairs on two sides of the acting space, with their props and costume bits under their chairs, or on a shelf behind them. This encouraged responsibility for personal props, made for quick entrances and exits, and meant, with no backstage or wing space - there was no need for backstage noise control. Love it.
• Silly Sally had huge yellow crepe paper bows in her hair, and a hula hoop.
• The goose had some gold-coloured cloth tied around her shoulders, and a long-beaked half-face mask. These don't come in children's sizes, but you could build up something light, stable and comfortable with papier mache and wire, and if it doesn't fit comfortably, staple it to a hairband, and your actor can wear it like a unicorn' horn, and play it for laughs.
• Colin, Princess Nicola, Mum, Dad and the King had tabards with their acrostics on them in large letters. Colin and Nicola's were reversible.
• The King stuck his proclamation poster up with authentic medieval blutak.
• Tom/Colin need a papier mache axe, but I suggest miming the Harley Davidson.

If you'd like to use this version of The Golden Goose, please do, and give me some feedback, ok?! I'd like to know about straight takes, but also what you and your kids do to make it yours.

Noëlle

P.S. Sorry about the formatting. No clue in the blogosphere. As I've said before!

THE GOLDEN GOOSE (extended version)

© Noëlle Williamson 2010

(9 actors doubling 17 roles)

Princess / Mother

Puppeteer 1 / Little Old Man

Puppeteer 2 / Silly Sally (Puppeteers were 6 & 7 years old, and made their own double-fronted puppets from 1.5L water bottles clothed with glued-on fabric scraps and stuffed sock heads with stuck-on wool hair and happy/sad faces drawn with felt tip – tied tightly around the bottle necks. We had a Punch & Judy-style puppet theatre, and the children were visible, holding their puppets. Alternatively, a long loop of string attached at the top of the puppet head makes a basic marionette that a child this age/size can walk along the floor.)

Narrator / Landlord

Father / King

Princess

Poi Juggler / Tom / Goose (small roles for child with good co-ordination/comic flair)

Stage Manager / Dumling (Colin)

Marcus (Injured Hero) This is a cameo for a camp leader/teacher

PROLOGUE

(3-part round to the tune of Frère Jacques - very cheesy, but useful for E2L cast practising contractions & performing to small audience.)

Everyone Hi, I’m XX. My name’s XX.

(I’m XX. My name’s XX.)

(Hi, I’m XX. I’m XX. I’m XX.)

This is our show. (x2) It’s called The Golden Goose. (x2) Now, off we go. Off we go.

Narrator This is Princess Nicola.

Princess Hello.

Narrator She’s Pretty, Rich, Intelligent, Nice, Curious, Energetic,

Princess Sad, and Soooooooooo lonely. I never laugh

King or smile.

Princess Never.

Juggler This is

King The King. I’m Kind, Intelligent, Nice…….. I’m Great!

Juggler The King has a plan to make his daughter smile.

King (writing) WANTED. SOMEONE WHO CAN MAKE PRINCESS NICOLA LAUGH. REWARD. YOU CAN MARRY HER AND LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER.

Signed, The King.

There!

Juggler Are you serious?

King I’m serious.

Princess What? But Daddy!

King So, who wants to marry my daughter?

Juggler Me! Here’s a riddle. What’s brown and sticky?

Princess I don’t know. What is brown and sticky?

Juggler A stick! Boom! Boom!

Princess Boom boom?

Juggler You’re supposed to laugh now. A stick…….. stick – y……… Get it?

Princess You must be joking.

Juggler Yes! No! I mean…………. (Juggler sighs and exits.)

(Stage Manager crosses the stage, puts props on a chair.)

Princess Daddy, who’s that? (Stage Manager looks round, exits)

King I don’t know, Nicola.

Puppeteer 1 I can make you laugh! Tickletickletickle! (Tickles with feather.)

Princess What are you doing?

Puppeteer 1 I’m tickling you. Aren’t you ticklish?

(Princess gives Puppeteer 1 a withering look. Puppeteer 1 sighs and exits.)

(Stage Manager crosses stage, puts props on a chair, smiles shyly at Princess.)

Princess Who - ?

Juggler Look at me! Look at me! (Juggler whirls Poi. Gets tangled, falls over.) Oops! Ta daah!

Princess Ta daah?

Juggler (on floor) You’re supposed to laugh now.

(Princess folds her arms. Juggler sighs. Tries to get up.)

Stage Manager (to Princess) Excuse me. (Stage Manager picks Juggler up and exits.)

Princess Who - ?

(Puppeteer 1 and Puppeteer 2 enter with puppets, start puppet show.)

Puppeteer 1 This is the story of The Golden Goose. It’s VERY FUNNY.

Puppeteer 2 (MUM puppet) Dumling! Go to the woods! Chop down some trees!

Puppeteer 1 (SAD COLIN puppet) Yes Mum.

Puppeteer 2 (SALLY puppet) In the wood, Colin meets

Puppeteer 1 (L.O.M. puppet) A Little Old Man.

Puppeteer 2 (SALLY puppet) A little girl called Sally.

Puppeteer 1 (L.O.M. puppet) A Little Old Man!

Puppeteer 2 (SALLY puppet) A little girl !

Puppeteer 1 (L.O.M. puppet) Man!

Puppeteer 2 (SALLY puppet) Girl!

Puppeteer 1 (L.O.M. puppet) Man!

Puppeteer 2 (SALLY puppet) Girl!

Puppeteer 1 (L.O.M. puppet) Man!

Puppeteer 2 (SALLY puppet) Girl!

Stage Manager Stop! (Either the puppet theatre falls over or marionettes get tangled up. Stage Manager rights theatre or untangles marionettes.)

Princess Who are you?

Stage Manager The stage manager. The summer camp kids are doing a play today –

(Loud crash off-stage. Yells of pain. Marcus enters limping, supported by actors, bandages wrapped around his head)

Stage Manager Marcus! What happened?

Marcus (groaning tragically) I fell over the Cubeecraft (whatever project the kids associate with him) display. Owwwwwwwwww!

Stage Manager Oh no!

Puppeteer 2 You’d better lie down.

Puppeteer 1 Call a doctor! (They help Marcus exit.)

Narrator But the play is about to start.

Stage Manager And he’s playing the hero!

Narrator Well, you’re the stage manager. You’ll have to go on in his place.

Stage Manager But –

Princess (trying not to smile) What a good idea!

Narrator (noticing) Yes. What a good idea! Would you like to sit down, your Highness? (calls out) Places everyone! (Everyone gets into position for the start of the play.)

Narrator Ready? O.k. This is Colin. He's the hero of this story. Colin is Cheerful, Optimistic, Loyal, Intelligent and Nice. The only people who don’t think so are his parents and his brother, Tom. They don’t call him Colin, they call him Dumling. These are Colin’s parents. They're always arguing.

Mum (to Dad) You are Dirty, Awful and Disgusting! I hate you!

Dad (to Mum) Me? You are Mean, Useless and Miserable!

Narrator The only thing Colin’s parents agree about is Colin.

Mum As for you!

Dad You are

Mum Daft

Dad Useless

Mum Messy

Dad Lazy

Mum Idiotic

Dad Nerdy

Mum and Grumpy!

Both You’re a dumling!

Narrator ….and Colin’s brother, Tom

Mum Terrific

Dad Outstanding

Mum Marvellous

Dad That’s my boy!

Narrator Poor Colin. (Colin sighs) Colin’s father is a lumberjack. He chops down trees, and sells the wood. However, he's also very lazy, and h's always thinking of excuses not to go to work. One day,

Dad Ow. I’ve got a headache…No. That was yesterday... Owwwww. I’ve got ear-ache... No. That was last week... Oh! I know! (holds up one hand, with one finger bent out of sight) OOOOOWWWWWWWW! I’ve lost my finger! I can’t find it anywhere! I can’t go to work today. Here, Tom. Take my axe, go to the woods and chop down some trees.

Tom Oh Dad. I don’t want to. I’m playing …………………………….

Mum Never mind, Tom. I’ve made you a little packed lunch. Look: cheese sandwiches, ham sandwiches, egg sandwiches, chicken sandwiches, chocolate cake, apple pie, three bananas, a strawberry milkshake, a peach smoothie, and a litre of orange juice. Do you think that’s enough?

Tom Got any crisps?

Mum / Dad (proudly) That’s my boy!

Narrator Tom gets on his Harley Davidson and rides to the woods. (Tom makes motorbike noises). When he gets there, he's so tired that he goes to sleep under a tree. When he wakes up, he sees

Little Old Man a little old man. Hello Tom.

Tom How do you know my name?

Little Old Man I know lots of things…….. I'm hungry and thirsty. Will you share your packed lunch with me?

Tom Are you kidding? I’ve only got enough for one person: me! Go away old man!

Little Old Man I see. Well you didn’t help me. So I won’t help you.

Tom Well I don’t care! – He’s gone! Huh! I suppose I ought to do some work.

Narrator Tom picks up the axe and swings it, but as soon as the blade hits the tree

Tom (axe bounces and hits him on the head) Ow! Ow ow ow owwwwww! Mum!

Narrator and he runs all the way home.

Mum Oh! My poor baby!

Narrator The next day

Dad Ow. I’ve got a headache… No… Ow. I’ve got ear-ache… No... Ow. I’ve got (holds up one hand) No! Oh! I know!.OOOOOWWWWWWWW! I’ve lost my leg! I can’t find it anywhere! I can’t go to work today. Dumling! Here, Dumling. Go and do some work, you lazy, useless boy.

Colin Sure. Er, can I have a packed lunch, Mum?

Mum A packed lunch? Do you think I’m you’re slave? If you’re hungry, find something in the cupboard.

Colin Is there anything in the fridge?

Mum Only some cheese, ham, egg, chicken, chocolate cake, apple pie, bananas, milk, yoghurt and orange juice, and we need that for your poor sick brother. Don’t we, Tommykins?

Tom Got any crisps?

Mum / Dad (proudly) That’s my boy!

Narrator Poor Colin. (Colin sighs)He finds some stale bread and some water, picks up his father’s axe -

Dad You be careful with that axe! It’s worth a lot of money!

Narrator and sets off for the woods.

Colin When he gets to the wood, he's tired, and sits down under a tree. Suddenly, he sees

Little Old Man a little old man. Hello Colin.

Colin How do you know my name?

Little Old Man I know lots of things…….. I'm hungry and thirsty. Will you share your packed lunch with me?

Colin I've only got a piece of stale bread and some water, but you can have half.

Little Old Man Thank you. (They eat) Now, you helped me, so I'll help you. Look over there.

Colin What is it?

Little Old Man A golden goose. Take her. She'll bring you luck.

Goose Honk!

Colin Thank – He’s gone! Wow! A golden goose. Maybe you’re magic? Can you speak?

Goose Honk!

Colin No…… Can you lay golden eggs?

Goose Honk!

Colin No….. Oh well. Maybe you’ll bring me luck, like the old man said!

Narrator Colin decides to go and seek his fortune. Colin and the golden goose walk a long, long way, until they come to

Colin an inn.

Landlord Welcome to my inn. Rooms 55 euros a night. But your duck can stay in the stable for nothing.

Goose Honk!

Landlord Pardon?! This is my daughter, Sally.

Sally Hello, I’m Sally, and I’m seven.

Landlord This is Sally, and she’s silly!

Sally What’s that?

Landlord It’s a duck.

Goose Honk!

Colin She’s a golden goose.

Sally She’s pretty. Can I have one, Dad?

Landlord No.

Sally Please.

Landlord No.

Sally Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease?

Landlord Nonononono…………… 55 euros, please, sir.

Colin But I haven’t got any money.

Landlord Goodbye. (leaves)

Colin Oh dear. I’m so tired.

Sally You can sleep in the stable if you like.

Colin Great! Thanks.

Landlord But Sally wants a golden feather from the golden goose. That night, while everyone is asleep, she creeps into the stable, and tries to steal a feather. But when she touches the golden goose –(right hand)

Goose Honk!

Colin What?

Sally Oh! I’m stuck! Help! Help! Dad!

Landlord What’s going on? Sally!

Colin But when the landlord touches Sally – (right hand)

Goose Honk!

Colin What?

Landlord Oh! I’m stuck! Help! Help!

Colin So we all stay in the stable all night long. (All lie down)

Landlord The next morning,

Colin (fresh as a daisy, stretching comfortably) Off we go!

Goose Honk!

Landlord and Sally struggle up. All line up side by side, facing audience, and walk on the spot. Colin enregetic, both arms swinging. Goose waddling, waggling bottom. Landlord and Sally trudging dejectedly)

Landlord We walk miles

Sally and miles

Landlord and miles!

Sally My feet hurt.

Landlord I’m tired.

Sally I want to go home.

Goose Honk!

King At last, they come to a kingdom. My kingdom. Remember me? Kind, intelligent, nice, absolutely great, in fact! And my daughter -

Princess Princess Nicola. Hello again.

King My daughter is pretty, rich, intelligent, nice, curious, energetic,

Princess sad, and soooooooooo lonely. I never laugh

King or smile.

Princess Never.

King But if you remember, I’ve got a plan.

Princess Daddy, no…… Please….. This is so embarrassing!

King Now Nicola, Dad knows best! Everyone, look at this poster.

Everyone WANTED. SOMEONE WHO CAN MAKE PRINCESS NICOLA LAUGH. REWARD. YOU CAN MARRY HER AND LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER.

Signed,

The King

King So, do you like my plan?

Princess No!

Colin Yes! Hang on, I know a very funny joke….

Sally No!

Landlord What?

Sally I want to marry him!

Landlord But you’re only seven.

Sally and a half!

Landlord Right! We’re going home now!

Sally No!

Colin/Landlord Yes (tug-o-war – King joins in)

Lots of shouting and honking. Princess starts laughing.

Little Old Man Look! Look!

Colin Will you marry me?

Princess What? Wait! You’re the Stage Manager, right?

Marcus (Colin) (puzzled) Yes!

Princess O.K. then. Yes!

Goose HONK! (chain breaks, Landlord and Sally fall over)

Narrator/Landlord And we all live happily ever after.

EVERONE THE END!

The Golden Goose - short version - 2nd EFL summer camp play

A classic fairy tale. It's in the narrative present, with lots of contractions as I think the short lines provide an opportunity to drill contractions and weak forms painlessly. However, if you want more of an old-fashioned, fairytale feel, you could go back to the full forms! Note subtle use of adjectives! There's a section on acrostics in Writing With Children, by Jackie Reilly and Vanessa Reilly, in the Oxford Resource Books for Teachers series. Excellent primary/junior resource book, and not just for native speakers.

The narrative passes from character to character.

We did this in a rectangular room, with the audience in one half and the acting space in the other. The actors sat on chairs on two sides of the acting space, with their props and costume bits under their chairs, or on a shelf behind them. This encouraged responsibility for personal props, made for quick entrances and exits, and meant, with no backstage or wing space - there was no need for backstage noise control. Love it.

Silly Sally had huge yellow crepe paper bows in her hair, and a hula hoop. The goose had a half-face mask, and some gold-coloured cloth tied around her shoulders. The King stuck his proclamation poster up with authentic medieval blutak.

If you'd like to use this version of The Golden Goose, please do, and give me some feedback, ok?!

Noëlle

(P.S. Sorry about the formatting. No clue in the blogosphere.)

The Golden Goose - Short Version

© Noëlle Williamson 2010

Characters (8 actors)

Mother

Silly Sally

Landlord

Little old man

Father / King

Princess

Goose

Dumling (Colin)

Princess Hi. I’m Princess Nicola. I'm in this story, but not yet. This is Colin. He's the hero of this story. Colin is Cheerful, Optimistic, Loyal, Intelligent and Nice. The only people who don’t think so are his parents. They don’t call him Colin, they call him Dumling. These are Colin’s parents. They are always arguing.

Mum (to Dad) You're Dirty, Awful and Disgusting! I hate you!

Dad (to Mum) Me? You are Mean, Useless and Miserable!

Princess The only thing Colin’s parents agree about is Colin.

Mum As for you!

Dad You are

Mum Daft

Dad Useless

Mum Messy

Dad Lazy

Mum Idiotic

Dad Nerdy

Mum and Grumpy!

Both You’re a dumling!

Princess Poor Colin. (Colin sighs) He decides to leave home forever. One night, when his parents are asleep, Dumling takes some stale bread and some water, and creeps out of the house.

Colin He walks a long way, until he meets

Old Man a little old man. Hello Colin.

Colin How do you know my name?

Old Man I know lots of things…….. I am hungry and thirsty.

Colin I've only got a piece of stale bread and some water, but you can have half.

Old Man Thank you. (They eat) Now, you helped me, so I'll help you. Look over there.

Colin What is it?

Old Man A golden goose. Take her. She'll bring you luck.

Goose Honk!

Colin Thank – He’s gone!

Landlord Colin and the golden goose walk a long, long way. They come to an inn. Welcome to my inn. Rooms 55 euros a night. But your duck can stay in the stable for nothing.

Goose Honk!

Landlord Pardon?! This is my daughter, Sally.

Sally Hello, I’m Sally, and I’m seven.

Landlord This is Sally, and she’s silly!

Sally What’s that?

Landlord It’s a duck.

Goose Honk!

Colin She’s a golden goose.

Sally She’s pretty. Can I have one, Dad?

Landlord No.

Sally Please.

Landlord No.

Sally Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease?

Landlord Nonononono…………… 55 euros, please, sir.

Colin But I haven’t got any money.

Landlord Goodbye. (leaves)

Colin Oh dear. I’m so tired.

Sally You can sleep in the stable if you like.

Colin Great! Thanks. (Colin and Goose lie down)

Landlord But Sally wants a golden feather from the golden goose. That night, while everyone is asleep, she creeps into the stable, and tries to steal a feather. But when she touches the golden goose – (right hand)

Goose Honk!

Colin What?

Sally Oh! I’m stuck! Help! Help! Dad!

Landlord What’s going on? Sally!

Colin But when the landlord touches Sally – (right hand)

Goose Honk!

Colin What?

Landlord Oh! I’m stuck! Help! Help!

Colin So we all stay in the stable all night long. (All lie down)

Landlord The next morning,

Colin (fresh as a daisy, stretching comfortably) Off we go!

Goose Honk!

Landlord and Sally struggle up. All line up side by side, facing audience, and walk on the spot. Colin enregetic, both arms swinging. Goose waddling, waggling bottom. Landlord and Sally trudging dejectedly)

Landlord We walk miles

Sally and miles

Landlord and miles!

Sally My feet hurt.

Landlord I’m tired.

Sally I want to go home.

Goose Honk!

King (genial, expansive) At last, they come to a kingdom. My kingdom.

Princess This is my father.

King I’m the king. I’m Kind, Intelligent, Nice…….. I’m Great! And this is my daughter.

Princess Princess Nicola. Hello again.

King My daughter is Pretty, Rich, Intelligent, Nice, Curious, Energetic,

Princess Sad, and Soooooooooo lonely. I never laugh

King or smile.

Princess Never.

King But I’ve got a plan. A kind

Princess intelligent…. nice…

King GREAT plan. Look at this poster.

Everyone WANTED. SOMEONE WHO CAN MAKE PRINCESS NICOLA LAUGH. REWARD. YOU CAN MARRY HER AND LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER.

Signed,

The King

King Do you like my plan?

Princess No!

Colin Yes! Hang on, I know a very funny joke….

Sally No!

Landlord What?

Sally I want to marry him!

Landlord But you’re only seven.

Sally and a half!

Landlord Right! We’re going home now!

Sally No!

Colin/Landlord Yes (tug-o-war – King & Princess join in)

Lots of shouting and honking. Princess starts laughing.

King Look! Look!

Colin Will you marry me?

Princess What? Yes!

Goose HONK! (chain breaks)

Everyone And we all live happily ever after. THE END.